Thank You Mom

Inspiration for this post comes from:

1. Mimi 

2. Garth Brooks Performs "Mom" on the Ellen Show

Dad Out Loud just celebrated its one year anniversary. Yes, that is just a grandiose way to say I wrote a blog post a year ago. Not really that exciting for anyone, but me. I have enjoyed this avenue of reflection and storytelling. With 10 posts in 2019 and almost 5,000 views I have a lot of catching up to do on my writing in 2020. 

I completed my doctorate in December and hope to write more now that the dissertation has been completed. However, three months in to 2020 and I have not written anything. If you are interested in reading my dissertation you can access it here: 

https://digitalcommons.brandman.edu/edd_dissertations/291/

I only recommend reading chapters IV and V. Or you can wait for the forthcoming book. :) 

As I reflect on 2019 I am proud to have finished the doctoral journey, started this Dad Out Loud blog, and continued, with Vicky, to make our family dreams come true. My favorite post of the year was the one about my dad. My dad is a man ahead of his time...he has practiced, possibly even perfected, social distancing for decades. He is now considered the "sage of social distancing". A true master. 

Papa did visit us again this past fall. It was such a great trip. He was here for three weeks, shot his first deer, and we went to a Notre Dame football game. Quite an unbelievable trip. Yes, I made him a little uncomfortable with all of the social connecting we did. However, this post is not about my dad, it is about Mimi. Mimi is the social connector of the family. 


Let's be honest...our family moving to Michigan has been the toughest on my mom. (Although, we have reassured her that she could come live in Michigan six months a year if she wanted) As of now, Mimi plans to visit us for Easter. Although, who knows at this point! 

My mom is one of the most selfless people I have ever met. Perhaps at times even too much so. She is the best and I love her very much. This story captures the essence of Mimi's sacrifice, empathy, & compassion. 


Decades ago California had a very wet winter. I do not remember the exact year but it may have been the year of El Nino (Yo Soy El Nino). Essentially, our backyard flooded.  The retaining wall crashed in to the pool and the water entered the back sliding door of the house, requiring us to pull up a majority of the kitchen floor, fix the pool, and rebuild the wall. Living in a Southern California you never expect to get this kind of damage from rain. 

Around the time of the backyard flood my mom received the Honorary Service Award from the Scott Avenue Elementary School PTA. At the time this award was given to one staff member and one parent each year. My mom was always actively involved in our schools. Some of my fondest memories growing up are of those running around Scott Avenue Elementary School with my brother, sister, and friends. 

On the night that she was honored with this award I remember how they told stories about all of the work she had done on behalf of the school. Story after story was told about how how she coordinated events to benefit the school. More importantly, they told stories about how she went above and beyond to help impact families in need. Providing families with the most basic of needs. They read letters directly from impacted families that my mom had helped, or coordinated help for, and they read off a list of volunteer accomplishments. It was a well deserved honor for my mom. That is sacrifice.

Yes, the wall was rebuilt, the pool was fixed, and eventually the kitchen floor was replaced. But it was around the same time that all of this was happening when my mom got her award. I kept thinking to myself about the irony of her getting this award while we were rebuilding at home. No easy task, but that is my mom. Always doing for others and setting a great example for her children. Thank you mom. 

My next post about Mimi will be about the time she almost got arrested, true story. :) 

The Rockstar!

The Rockstar! 

Before we get to my ROCKSTAR wife, I just wanted to share this photo that was sent to use last week.

Grandpa Art sent Vicky and I this picture one morning last week before the girls all walked in to school. The picture is a little dark, but it gave me goosebumps when I saw it. Two years ago when we decided to move to Michigan, this is what we dreamed of. We thought it would take 3-5 years to make this happen, but here we are just a year later and this picture represents a dream come true. Our girls going to school with their cousins. Content is the word that comes to mind. The last few months have been very busy for us as we get accustomed to new routines but I have felt great about the decisions that we made to get us to this point. It feels like we are home now and we can begin to really settle in.

Vicky does not like attention, so I will brag for her. I have watched her work furiously at home the last few months to make hundreds of visuals for her students. Yes, this means endless amounts of paper, color ink, and lamination. I often just see $$$$ signs in this at home work, but I know she is doing it to best support her kiddos. (As a side note, I am not allowed to use her laminator anymore. Last school year she asked me to laminate the last three sheets she had to do, so she could take Lucy to practice. I was happy to help but the results were not great.)

Some of the visuals that Vicky has been working on revolved around the appropriate use of a restroom. You can imagine what the visuals looked liked. She works tirelessly to seek the best solutions for her students. She would never say this, but I will for her, she is a tremendous asset to the students she works with AND their families. She is a ROCKSTAR teacher.

Our own children are very special, but they do not have special needs. Yet, I worry about them all the time. How are they doing at school? Are they behaving? Do they have friends? Did they eat lunch? Are they getting all of the grade level common core content standards delivered through heaping amounts of direct instruction and lots of homework? (Ok, I am kidding about that last one. I just wanted to see if you are still reading. As I side note, all I really care about for my girls at school is that they behave, they enjoy going to school, and that they develop a love for learning).

I can only imagine the level of anxiety I would have for my child at school if they had special needs. Especially, the level of need that Vicky's students often have. It must be reassuring to these families that they have access to Vicky all of the time. The emails, texts, and phone calls she makes to parents (and receives from parents) after school hours provides a level of comfort that I am sure they they are thankful for. She has even set up play-dates for our girls and her students. Truly, above and beyond care for her students and their families.

The restroom visuals that Vicky was working on, and I wa$ complaining about, turned out to be transformational for one of her students. Vicky's colleague pointed out to her that one of her school parents posted on social media about how thankful they were for the work Vicky did with their child for them to be able to use the restroom. The mom wrote about the significant amounts of money, time, and effort she had spent to get her child to use the restroom, without success. However, in a few short weeks Vicky has made great progress with the student. Clearly, a thankful parent.

Not only is Vicky a ROCKSTAR teacher, but she is a ROCKSTAR mom. She is the true #MomOutLoud. Balance is hard when there is so much "newness" in our lives, but our ROCKSTAR continues to be the rock of our family that we all count on. Vicky even calls and texts my mom,  dad, and sister more than I do. She is in top of all of the girls activities and knows just what they need all the time.

Vicky is also a ROCKSTAR wife. She has picked up the slack the last two years while I have spent countless Saturday mornings and late nights working on my dissertation/coursework. Not to mention both of us starting a new job each year since we moved from California. She never complains. She keeps me on track. I tried to skip a soccer game the other day, because there was "too much work that needed to be done". She calmly corrected me and said, "there are only a few games left". She did not demand that I go, but she said enough that I came to my senses and went to the soccer game. We love you Vicky!

Lucy: Lucy is loving school. She was just named Student of the Month. So proud of our little girl. She finally stopped saying she wants to go back to Zeeland, but she still says she wants to move back to California. Lucy is having a great soccer season. It is fun to watch her play, even when I have a lot of work to do. :)

Emily Potato: Emily loves school and her teacher. Her teacher's name is Emily, so she loves that. She is still wonderfully amazing and still marches to the beat of her own drummer. Below is a representation of how the soccer season is going for her.

<----The pose for Picture Day before the season starts


The pose for when the games start. ---->

Boss Baby: Macy is feisty as ever. She has a tremendous vocabulary. She amazes us every day with the things she says. She is very smart and sassy. She enjoys soccer, but not as much as the snack after the game. She is going to be our wild child. Buckle up!

Hardcore Damicos and A Quiet Summer Update

The “Hardcore Damicos” & A Quiet Summer Update:

London, Emily, and Lucy on moving day! 

Vicky got a new job this summer. I got a new job this summer. We bought and sold a house. We went to California for two weeks. We took a road trip to Milwaukee with the Vanderpools, which included stops at Miller Brewing, the Brewers ballpark, and the Jelly Belly Factory. I wrote chapters I, II & III of my dissertation. Yet, it was still a much quieter summer than last year. The long story (short) is that Thornapple Kellogg (TK), which is in the town where Vicky’s sister lives and our niece goes to school, posted an ASD classroom job. Moving to Kent County was always our goal, but we thought it would take longer to do this. Vicky applied for the job and she got it. We decided in May that we would move to Caledonia, Mi so that the girls could go to school with their cousins and we would live much closer to Tina and Jesse.

I ended up taking an elementary principal job in a school district much closer to our new home. It is Parkview Elementary in Wyoming, Michigan. Yes, you can follow us on Instagram @ParkviewPack. So, we had a lot of change this summer, but we are very happy about where we have landed. When I explained all of this to a friend, that recently moved his family out of California, he said the “Damico’s are hardcore”. Yes, it was a lot to move again this summer but we are in such a better spot to be near the only family that we have here in Michigan. Plus, it does not hurt that the girls (and Colton) will all go to school together. And, it is nice to have deer walking through your backyard. 

Lucy at the Jelly Belly Factory

Girls update:

Boss Baby Macy (little legs or chicken nugget are her two most recent nicknames) is adjusting to having her own room, but she is happy that she has the closest room to her mom. We will still, on occasion, find her sleeping under her bed and/or with a roll of paper towels. She is still as feisty as ever and incredibly smart.

Emily Potato is still interesting. She loves her new room and her new “Ryan” blanket.  Ryan, a Youtube star, is her future husband, so she says. I will encourage this relationship but I will not say why…https://www.businessinsider.com/ryan-toysreview-7-year-old-makes-22-million-per-year-youtube-2018-12. J Emily is very excited to start “big girl” school with Lucy this year. Emily will be in Young 5’s.

Lucy Lou loves her new office. Our new home has an office in the garage, so this has become the girl’s art room. They all love it, but Lucy spends a lot of time in there. She is excited to start 1^st grade.

Allie is adjusting to our new home. She has only got out once so far and had a nice two hours running around the new neighborhood before our neighbors found her.

Vicky is excited to be at TK and start a new ASD program. She is trying to get in to her classroom as much as possible. 

And me, I bought a Peloton bike. So, if you want to be “Peloton” friends with me you can find me @dadoutloud.

If you have a dad story that you want to share with me please send it to NicholasDamico@gmail.com. Follow Nick on Twitter @mrdamico and as always Dad Out Loud on Twitter and Instagram @dadoutloud1 #DadOutLoud 

Impostor Syndrome & Emily Potato

Inspiration for this post comes from:

1. The Impostor Syndrome 
2. Sweet Potato Emily 
3. Babygirl Janae 


I got a compliment recently. It was a pleasant surprise that I was not expecting. It was a compliment about this Dad Out Loud blog. It came from someone that I have a great deal of respect for.  It was nice to hear that at least one person is reading all of this jazz. :) She said "we need more dads to follow your model". I had to quickly correct her. I am NOT a model anything, let alone a model dad. I often feel like I am not a competent parent. I have a significant case of impostor syndrome when it comes to being a dad. I feel like we are just making it up as we go. I should not say "we", Vicky is a great mom.

The "complimenter"and I agreed that the purpose of the Dad Out Loud blog was a noble one. To tell my dad story in the hopes that others would be willing to share their dad stories. We are all in this together. Being a dad has been the best and most rewarding job I have ever had. At the same time, it is the most challenging job I have ever had. It has changed me more than any reading, professional development or class I have ever taken. I am a "transformed" person because of three little girls. They are our constant, unwavering WHY.

Getting the compliment prompted me to write a new post. I would really like to update this blog more often than I do, but life gets in the way. I have a lot of posts saved in my drafts, just need time to get back and finish them. The compliment that I received also reminded me of the power of building up other people. You never know the effect that you will have on someone with your words and actions. It also reminded me that we need to build up our daughters and make sure they have a healthy level of confidence. We need to love on them and compliment them on their unique abilities and my sweet potato Emily is certainly unique.

Lucy once said that Emily was the "interesting" one in our family. At first my reaction was to jump in to defend Emily and her "interstingness", but upon further review she was right. And that is a good thing. Emily is INTERESTING. I love that about her. She does not drink milk out of a cup, only through a straw out of a bowl. At night when she goes to bed, she takes a bottle of warm water. WARM WATER. Not hot, not cold, just warm. Half a cup of water in the microwave for twenty seconds. Recently, when Lucy was asked what type of animal she would be, if she were an animal, she responded, "I would be a leopard or a cheetah, because they are fast". And Emily chimed in, "I would be a leprechaun." That is my interesting girl! Her leprechaun comment follows up the time she told us she wanted to be a unicorn when she grows up. Whatever you want to be Sweet Potato!

We know that Emily is loving, caring, and kind. She gets along with everyone. She is feisty and funny.  She loves her baby Janae that we traveled with to California. Even at Downtown Disney she had to carry her baby. Video Here -----> Emily and Janae Downtown Disney (As a side note, Janae got checked by TSA on the way back to Michigan, seriously. She was taken off the conveyor belt by an agent and back to the TSA station where they swabbed her. She passed the test and was allowed to board the plane. I wish I had a video of this!) Emily is sweet and sassy too. She is a friend to everyone and I appreciate the innocence in the way she sees the world. She will be starting at "big girl" school this year, Young 5's. She keeps on us our toes and we would not ever want her to not be INTERESTING!

     

P.S.-Should I do a VLOG? I might be able to upload more content if I Vlogged occasionally.

P.S.S.-Still no edible slime... one day, maybe. :)

If you have a dad story that you want to share with me please send it to NicholasDamico@gmail.com. Follow Nick on Twitter @mrdamico and as always Dad Out Loud on Twitter @dadoutloud1 #DadOutLoud and Instagram @dadoutloud. 

Moving Emotions and a Maycember Update

I have recently decided it is better to "have your emotions moved to tears" than to say "I cried". Doesn't that sound better? I am not crying, my emotions are just moving. That does sound better. In his famous ESPY speech in 1993, only weeks before he died, Jim Valvano implored us all to do three things every single day. We should laugh. We should think. We should have our emotions moved to tears, whether happy or sad. If you laugh, think, and cry in the same day, that is a good day.

It is ok if we allow movies (or tv shows, or music, or commercials for that matter) to move our emotions to tears. I remember the first time a movie moved my emotions, at least the first movie that I remember moving my emotions. Forrest Gump. Yep...when Forrest eulogizes Jenny at her gravesite and tells her all about their son. Lots of emotions moved at that point. "Every night we read a book. He is so smart Jenny. You would be so proud of him. I am." Oh boy! If you have not watched this three minute clip recently, here it is....Forrest Gump. If this does not move your emotions, I do not know what will.

Much to my surprise I am learning that Lucy shares my reflective and sentimental nature. Last night in anticipation of Toy Story 4, coming out at the end of June, we had an impromptu slumber party and Toy Story marathon. We watched Toy Story 3 first, because it would make too much sense to watch them in order. We then started, and almost made it through, the original Toy Story. I love all of the Toy Story movies and I am way more excited about TS4 than anyone else in my family.

In the closing moments of Toy Story 3 Andy gives his prized possessions away to Bonnie Anderson. He asks Bonnie to take care of the toys and he gives a particularly pointed speech to Bonnie about Woody. He says of Woody, 'he has been my pal for as long as I can remember. He has been my friend forever and he will never give up on you, he will always be there for you'. No sooner did he finish his speech to Bonnie that Lucy was having her emotions moved. My emotions moved just knowing that Lucy was having her emotions moved. She is such a sweet girl with a big heart. I am excited to take her to see Toy Story 4.

Maycember has been busier than ever for the Damico family. Grandpa Art visited for a few weeks allowing Vicky and I got to go to Baltimore Mother's Day Weekend. We got to see the Halos and the Orioles. Such a neat city and a great ballpark.

Big news! Lucy is reading. And, better yet, she is loving to read! All of a sudden a few weeks ago she just took off. So, thankful to her teachers (job-share) for building her up. She is so proud of her own progress. She also loves softball, mostly because she has two friends on her team and the MOST AMAZING ASSISTANT COACH EVER!

Emily is still interesting. She loved swim lessons and her new mermaid bathing suit. She is "graduating" from preschool this week and will start transitional K in the fall. She is excited about going to "big girl" school with Lucy. Vicky and I took Emily to Wrigley field to see the Angels and Cubs. She was a trooper for a very cold baseball game. That is by far the coldest game I have ever attended. Emily is Macy's best friend. Those two are inseparable right now. They have bunk beds but often we will find them sharing the same bed in the morning.

Macy is 3 going on 13. Her vocabulary is amazing and she is a crafty veteran when it comes to having dad wrapped around her finger. Recently, we had a family ice cream night and after devouring her own ice cream she sat on my lap and proceeded to eat my ice cream. She made sure to tell me with each bite that "sharing is caring". That girl! She has also decided that she loves to sleep with a roll of paper towels each tonight. We have no idea why.

And Allie...still living the dream and avoiding Vicky.

PS-Great ready for emotions to be moved in Toy Story 4
PSS-Still no edible slime....one day it will happen!

If you have a dad story that you want to share with me please send it to NicholasDamico@gmail.com. Follow Nick on Twitter @mrdamico and as always Dad Out Loud on Twitter and Instagram @dadoutloud1 #DadOutLoud 

The Boss Baby Turns 3

This blog post was inspired by the following:
1. Boss Baby Macy

2. A Birthday Video for Macy

https://youtu.be/3knc91svOTY

No more "two a half". The Boss Baby turned 3 this week! We were fortunate to be joined by my mom (mimi), my mother-in-law (nana), and father-in-law (grandpa) for the weekend. It was a fast, fun-filled weekend. Macy is very loved and spoiled. 

To: Boss Baby Macy 

You are now 3! Congratulations, you made it! While you are getting much bigger, I want you to know that you will always be my baby. Yes, the end of the line. (We think!?). I want you to know you are beautiful and you are loved. Your mom and I are crazy about you. You are smart and sassy. Your sisters and I came up with some advice for you on your birthday. 

1. From Dad: You are enough. You are beautiful and you were wonderfully made. You are enough. Macy Damico is special. Do not let anyone ever tell you differently.

(This is a blog post written by a junior-high friend of mine that sums up what I am trying to say. You are enough Macy Damico.)

https://www.facebook.com/notes/jonathan-blake/getting-to-be-jonathan-blake/10156640029484475/

2. From Lucy when asked what advice she has for you before you go to Kindergarten: "Stop wearing pull-ups. " This is sound advice from your oldest sister. It is ok to get help when you need it but eventually you have to spread your wings and fly. We will all be there to guide you as you grow up and to support you. You can do it girl!

3. From Dad: Everything good in life is worth working for. Nothing will be handed to you, but you are equipped to take on anything. You have the tenacity of your mom, the creativity of Lucy, and the tender spirit of Emily. There is nothing stopping you, but you have to work for it! 

4. From Emily when asked how you can earn more 'blue' (great) days vs. 'green' (good) days at school:"help clean up others messes."  Simply stated, yet this is great advice from your sister. Be someone that helps others in need. Be a friend. Be a listening ear. Be a team player. Help clean up the messes that others make. 

5. From Dad: Always play by the rules. However, feel free to color outside of the lines. Be creative. Be a trailblazer. Be the President of the United States. You do not have to be the the same as everyone.  You do not have to be Lucy, or Emily. You do not have to be your mom or your dad. There is only one Macy Damico. You have to be you and you have to be kind.

Yes, dad (me), got to give the most advice. Is not that the Dad way? Happy Birthday Macy!

If you have a dad story that you want to share with me please send it to NicholasDamico@gmail.com. Follow Nick on Twitter @mrdamico and as always Dad Out Loud on Twitter and Instagram @dadoutloud1 #DadOutLoud 

A Story About My Dad

Inspiration for this post comes from:

1. My Dad 

2. My Old Man (Zac Brown Band)


My dad is the best. This past summer I made him drive across the country with me when we moved to Michigan. It was fun. Three days and two nights of nothing but open road. The highlight of our trip was our stop at Kauffman Stadium to see the Royals play the Astros. Beautiful stadium. Growing up watching the California Angels we always talked about what a beautiful stadium the Royals played in. It did not disappoint.



My two favorite memories of Angel games played at Kauffman Stadium. Both games I vividly remember watching on TV with my dad.

1. Jim Edmonds GOAT catch

2. A Trout Big Fly at Kauffman

Other highlights of our road trip included a trip to Cracker Barrel (yes, when you are from So Cal this is a big deal), my dad's first ride in an UBER (they just pick you up and take you where you want to go?),  and the Highway Patrol Officer in Oklahoma that let US off with a warning. Ok, I'll be honest, let ME off with a warning. He was a very nice guy. He let me off because I told him we were moving OUT of California. This officer had no love for Cali, but that worked to my benefit on that day. And just as an FYI...if you are ever driving across the country, the speed limit drops significantly when you leave Texas and head to Oklahoma.

We left California at 4am and immediately hit the worst traffic we had the entire trip. That is not hyperbole. Literally, at 4am on a Los Angeles freeway, we were in traffic. We drove to all the way to New Mexico on day 1. However, one of the more memorable moments of the trip happened on this day. It went like this...

We are in Flagstaff Arizona and the gas tank reads "180 miles to empty". My dad is driving and he is exiting the highway.

Me: "What are you doing?"
Dad: "Gotta get gas. Sign said 60 miles until next station."

I didn't say anything. I just smiled on the inside and tweeted to document the moment. That was a classic "Greg" move. When I think of our road trip, I often think about this moment and it reminded me that I have learned a lot from my dad.

My dad is a model of consistency. From the time I can remember he was always up and out of the house before any of us were awake. He was "off" every day at 2:30 but that did not stop him. There was always work to be done. Mow the lawn, clean the pool, take out the trash, make dinner, wash dishes, get ready for practice. Day in and day out. There were no breaks or sitting down until he was certain his work for the day was completed. His work ethic was/is still surpassed by none. 

My dad was always adamant about me going to school. I can still hear him saying it clear as day: "you go to school, so you don't have to work as hard as I do". I took his advice and he was right. Going to school has provided our family with a lot of opportunities. However, I think I still have a lot to learn from the work ethic he modeled. 

Needless to say, my dad never runs out of gas. If you have less than half a tank of gas, you might as well get ready to push. The truck he bought in 2002 is still in mint condition. (yes, afghans still cover the leather seats). So many lessons to still be learned from my dad. Certainly, there will be more about him in later posts and my amazing mom too! 

Yes, this is 4AM in LA! 

If you read this far, congratulations. I am fully aware that this may be the most unanticipated blog of all time or the "leadership dad blog" that no one has been waiting for. However, it was writing itself in my mind. I had to share it! Stay tuned for more...

If you have a dad story that you want to share with me please send it to NicholasDamico@gmail.com. Follow Nick on Twitter @mrdamico and as always Dad Out Loud on Twitter and Instagram @dadoutloud1 #DadOutLoud 

PS-Edible slime watch: 8 days with no edible slime.